Uzman Makaleleri

Marriage, Middle Age, Lie - Madalyon Psikiyatri Merkezi

Marriage, Middle Age, Lie

Usually all men are afraid before marriage. They flee as the prey flees the predator. They are afraid of being caught by the hunter. For a while, they see girls as husband hunters. They do not have such fears at a young age, long before the age of marriage. Then there is only love for them. Even the idea that the end of love can lead to marriage has not yet sprout. It is easy for them to enter into serious relationships in these novice and inexperienced periods.

As the age of marriage comes, this fear begins to make itself felt. This is a strange fear. On the one hand, they see all the girls of marriageable age as a husband hunter, on the other hand, they look for the hunter who is not a hunter. However, the same is true for them at this time. They are already hunters. In the end, it is not known who hunts whom, but the marriage happens somehow.

A man looks for peace in marriage first and then mostly a good sex life. However, every man’s expectations from marriage can be different. They seek the order of their mother most. Being a father both scares them and makes them proud. After a while, in good marriages, they begin to see their spouses as their owners. They want to trust him, lean on him, lean on their partner. They always want to hear from their wives that they are a good husband and a good father. In fact, they want to hear it all the time, not just once. Hearing this connects them more to their homes and homes.

Spouses who constantly complain, criticize and dislike them are their fearful dreams. Such men often tend to cheat on their wives. All they look for when cheating on their spouses is a little excitement, a little change, but mostly to be admired, appreciated and admired. That’s why ladies, when deceived, always belittle their rivals for whether you deceived me with this. They think that they will be deceived by women who are superior and more beautiful than them. However, what a man is looking for is not a superior woman, but a woman who sees him as superior.


The fact that a man helps his wife with housework is seen as an extremely natural phenomenon today, and especially working women expect absolute support from their spouses in this regard. If both parties are working, it’s actually fair. Men should also help their wives in housework without any discrimination. However, some men do this easily, while some men are not used to such a thing. It is more difficult than it is thought to do for men who have always been served, respected and have no experience in this matter until then. Over time, he can learn to hold on to something, but he can never satisfy his wife in this sense. This can cause serious fights and arguments between spouses. For this reason, women should know well what kind of man they are marrying, and should know their spouse well before getting married. If their spouse is not prone to it, it may be wrong to make the marriage difficult just because of it. Not every man who does not or cannot help his wife in marital affairs is a bad husband. This gap can be closed in other areas.

Sometimes men can be more skilled at housework than women. While some men cook very well, some do the ironing very well. There are also men who are meticulous, constantly scavenging. Some even harass their spouse by meddling in everything. Although we psychiatrists recommend helping men to their wives, the rope should not be missed in this regard, and men should not abandon their male role.


Lying is a very broad concept. It is a wide spectrum that starts with not telling the truth and can reach to lying about vital issues. Little, white lies can be tolerated for all of us.

When it comes to lies, especially when it comes to men, the first thing that comes to mind is the lies told because they cheated on their wives. This is what comes to mind when you say lies about women. There is a prejudice that whatever the man lies about, another woman will come out of it. This is true in a sense. Men lie the most when they cheat on their wives. They cannot be expected to be honest about this, to say, my dear wife, I am cheating on you. What should be judged here is not the lie he said, but the action he did. That is an act of deception.

Another area where men lie the most is gambling. Men with a passion for gambling often lie about money.

Especially if there is a problem between their wives and their families, a man can lie about it.

Not all lies are bad. If women feel that their husbands are lying, they should first consider why they are lying and act accordingly. The little lies that are said to prevent unrest at home should not be overdone.

Middle age crisis

Midlife crisis affects men more than you think. When we say middle age, we should think about the age of forty or fifty. When men reach this age, they turn around and look behind them. What I have done, what I have lived, what I have accomplished, what I have not accomplished so far. There is not much danger in this period for peaceful, successful and satisfied men at work and at home. However, danger bells begin to ring at this age for men who have not found what they are looking for in life, have not achieved something, especially for men who have been crushed, despised, criticized, disliked, and have not been able to experience the satisfaction they want in their sexual life. It’s like they’re about to miss the last train. With a rush, a restlessness, and a dissatisfaction, they first begin to hold themselves accountable.

Just like in the menopause period of women, men need more attention, affection and praise in this period. Their tolerance has decreased. Especially sexuality gains more importance in this period because mountains of fear await. In this period, men try to pay more attention to their clothing and look younger than they are. Especially when they are taken from their spouse’s every move, they start blaming their spouses when they can’t find the spiritual satisfaction they think they deserve.

In general, they keep complaining about the fast flow of life, not being able to find time for anything, and not being able to do anything for themselves. Doing sports comes to mind at this age.

They start to blame their relatives for the failure and cause problems in every matter as soon as it happens.

Smart women notice this.

Uzman Bilgisi

Merkez Başkanı, Psikiyatrist
  • Üniversite : Ankara Üniversitesi, Tıp Fakültesi
  • Uzmanlık : Hacettepe Üniversitesi, Tıp Fakültesi, Ruh Sağlığı ve Hastalıkları Anabilim Dalı, Psikiyatri Uzmanlık Eğitimi


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